Thursday, January 28, 2010

Patience is a virture that The Duck doesn't always have...

...with herself.  Patience with others?  I'm pretty patient with others.  With myself?  not so much.

Shin Splints.  Shin Splints.  Shin Splints.  I hate them.  I loathe them.

So, last night, I joined a training group at Charm City Run.  I'm excited about it.  I'm excited about not being in isolation when I'm running.  The trainer, Juda, has an extreme amount of faith in all of us.  She seems to think that all of us will finish in about 45 minutes.  The plan that she is putting us on is very similar to the plan that I was already on, which is nice.  It's good to know that I was and am on the right track.

I've had marked improvement.  When I first started, I was doing 1.25ish miles in about 30ish minutes.  I'm up to 1.3ish in 30ish minutes.  That seems small, but hey, that's improvement.  I'll take improvement any day!

I've been realizing something as I've been going through this whole process.  I'm a really good student.  Put me in a classroom and I'm happy.  It really doesn't matter what that something is.  I took pottery for awhile, and I loved it.  I took a photography class, and I loved it.  There's a very distinct reason why I was a student for 24 years of my life.  (Fall 2008 was the first fall I did not go back to school at all...I'm weird, I + community college + grad school...I wear the geek name with pride.)  I'm a professional learner.  With that being said, I generally am a fast learner.

Running is a completely different type of learning.  It's retraining the body to do something that it doesn't always want to do.  I want the instant gratification, that I will be a great runner tomorrow.  Learning to run doesn't work that way.  Learning to run is a process.  The process doesn't allow for me to jump to the end.  The process requires me to keep plugging away, and keep building my strength.  I think that is why I keep pushing myself.  This is not a goal that I can achieve tomorrow.  This isn't like other goals...ones that can be rushed through.  I think that's why I keep pushing myself way too hard.  I keep thinking that I can be at my final goal...tomorrow.  If I do that, I will hurt myself, and then fall off the bandwagon, and then dash the goal before I even remotely get there.

I've had a couple conversations lately about how hard I've been on myself lately.  This just adds to it.  I'm having to learn to be patient with myself, and learn that this goal is one that cannot be rushed.  It will happen, with everyone's support, and by me...learning to be patient with myself, and chugging along.

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